By Mackenzie Smith

I’m just sitting in the pew,
Trying to look busy, fixing ties, fiddling with suits,
Anything to stop this embarrassing shaking.

But it’s all him.
In the back of my mind,
Echoing loud.

I see him everywhere,
Yet he’s nowhere to be found.

I want to cry,
I want to scream.
I want my tears to resonate in these walls.

I feel the potent urge to touch him,
To shake something inside him,
Weep and break,
So he knows how badly I need him to be here,
To be okay.

I can’t focus on the opera.
I can’t focus on them.

All I can do is sit,
Hands busy, eyes stinging, heart racing,
Praying that he’s okay.